Couple Marries After Both Losing Spouses to Cancer, Then Welcomes ‘Unexpected Miracle’ (Exclusive)

Kirsten and Jason Clawson keep their late spouses’ memories alive by celebrating their birthdays, hanging up old photos and visiting their graves as a family

At home in Utah, Kirsten and Jason Clawson live with their blended family of five.

When they married in 2022, Kirsten became stepmom to Jason’s sons Boston, 17, and Cooper, 11. A few months later, in December 2022, the couple welcomed a daughter, Maisie, an unexpected yet serendipitous addition to their home.

Between their three kids, two dogs and each other, the Clawsons lives are full of love. But while the home they share is strong, it was built on a foundation of heartbreak and grief.

Jason and Kirsten found each other in the wake of mutual loss. In 2019, Jason’s wife Valerie died of colon cancer at age 38. Kirsten’s husband Cody died of Acute Myeloid Leukemia at age 43 in 2020. Cody and Valerie both had genes that made them resistant to chemotherapy. They fought their cancer for the same amount of time, and they both ran out of treatment options after those nine months.

Jason and Kirsten first met on Facebook, in a group created for young widows in their area, and connected romantically through a dating app.

“When I saw his profile I knew exactly who he was, so I felt very comfortable moving forward with communicating with him,” Kirsten recalls to PEOPLE. “It was absolute magic the first time we spoke (and every day since).”

They’ve created something new together, but neither Jason nor Kirsten is leaving the past behind. Their relationship allows room for mourning and for the memories of their late spouses.

“We recognize the loss. We don’t ignore it or pretend it didn’t happen. We don’t get jealous of each other’s grief or love for their late spouse,” Kirsten says. “We ask each other what they need, especially around difficult anniversaries, and then we provide it.”

Kirsten and Jason keep pictures of Valerie and Cody hanging in their house and regularly tell stories about them. They visit both graves as a family, celebrate their birthdays and acknowledge the anniversaries of their deaths.

“We allow each other those moments,” Kirsten explains. “Recently, I was having a really tough time because we were returning to Houston, which is where my husband died, and Jason sat in the grief with me. He encouraged me to acknowledge it and feel it and cry on his shoulder.”

She adds that Jason’s professional experience as a therapist helps, as he’s “given me some really great advice on processing my grief,” she says. In turn, Kirsten gives him the same space to mourn.

“Once, while visiting Valerie’s grave, I asked Jason if he wanted a private moment with her, and he did,” Kirsten tells PEOPLE. “Many people think that because Jason is a therapist, grief was easier for him, which is absolutely not the case. He struggled like anyone else.”